


Sleep

by Quirky_Ginger



Category: Berena - Fandom, Holby City
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-21
Updated: 2018-06-26
Packaged: 2019-01-03 19:23:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 11,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12153198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Quirky_Ginger/pseuds/Quirky_Ginger
Summary: Thought I'd compile some Berena bedtime one shots.





	1. Late Night

CHAPTER ONE: LATE NIGHT

Night shifts weren't too bad, it was being on call which really took it out of you and sadly this week Bernie was that lucky soul who'd have to sleep with one eye open at bedtime.

Her and Serena lay on the sofa armed with a duvet, a variety of snacks and a cheesy movie that nobody was really bothered about. It had been a long week and Friday nights were officially now known as 'Lazy Fridays'. For Serena this was pure bliss. Her Bernie, food and wine (To be honest, what else do you need?) and Bernie loved these nights too but this week she knew she couldn't get too comfty, just in case. Serena sat next to Bernie on the sofa there legs and fingers both entwined and the odd peck on the cheek between the two. Ever since they had started this kind of weekly ritual of it just being the two of them, at home, whilst Jason went to Alan's, Bernie had become more and more gobsmacked that this was her life, that Serena had forgiven her so easily and that she had the honour of calling Serena hers and waking up next to her every morning. 

As the night went on and the film came to an end, Bernie's head became heavier and heavier. Not exactly because she was tired but the fact she had been sat in the same position for over 2 hours. She was half laid on Serena and before getting a dead shoulder, Serena thought it'd be best to move sooner rather than later.

'Come on, love. Let's head up' Serena suggested whilst lightly stroking her cheek and giving her a peck (purely for good measure)

Bernie didn't seem to want to move, her eyes remained closed whilst a smile crept up onto her face.

'Come on, Bern... move it'

'But I'm comfty now, 'Rena' Bernie protested.

'It's more comfty upstairs. Where neither one of us will get cramp. Now budge!'

Bernie replied with a groan and remained fixed to her position.

'BERENICE BLOODY WOLFE' Serena moaned.

But all Bernie replied with a snigger.

'That's it' Serena pushed Bernie onto her back on the sofa and pinned her hands down above her head in one swift move.

'Ha! Not so smart now are we, Wolfe?'

Both with huge smiles on their faces, Serena finally gave into temptation and kissed Bernie on the lips. Bernie immediately responded and her arms came up to Serena's back to try and pull her as close as she could. Bernie kissed her back with the same amouth of passion that Serena put in. Bernie's hands found themselves sliding up the back of her camisole and closer up to her shoulders before settling her hips. They finally stopped because of lack of breath and gazed into each others eyes.

'Shall we go upstairs? ' Bernie suggested.

'You didn't want to a minute ago'

'Well you know... circumstances changed' 

Serena leans in for anothere kiss when...

*bleep*bleep*bleep*

'You've got to be kidding me' Serena said whilst reaching for Bernie's pager, which lay on the coffee table.

'Pile up on the motorway. Hanssen needs you' Serena says, handing it over to Bernie in a sulking fashion

'Do you have to go?' Serena says before giving her another kiss.

'Afraid so. One of the head of departments has to be there and I reckon the other one having way too much fun already tonight'

'Not anymore' Serena said whilst getting up off Bernie.

Working in unison. Bernie tucks her shirt back into place and Serena wipes off the smudged lipstick from Bernie's cheek. They both walk towards the front door, Bernie collecting everything she needed on the way whilst Serena had the saddest look on her face, Bernie had ever seen.

'I'll be back as soon as I can... I promise' Bernie said whilst opening the door.

'Well don't be too long... a woman has needs'

'I'll try not be. I love you' Bernie kissed her before making her way to the car.

Serena stayed leant against the door until she saw Bernie drive off towards the hospital. Sighing as she closed the door in utter frustration.

\---

As quietly as she could, Bernie closed the door behind her and made her way into the kitchen. She dumped everything on the kitchen table before getting a glass of water and headed up to bed. This is not how she wanted the night to go. There had been more casualties than expected, not enough beds and 2 people had gone into cardiac arrest but finally she was home. Hours after what was expected. Bloody pagers.

She opened the door and smiled at the sight before her. Serena lay spread out with Bernie's pillow tickling her nose and her arm across where Bernie should be. Her hair sticking up in all directions and the duvet gathering neare her lower back. She was so beautiful, Bernie thought whilst admiring her.

Again being extremely quiet (although not being too good at it) she got changed, brushed her teeth and snuck into bed. Serena stirred as she Bernie had just laid down. Her arm immediately wrapping around Bernie's stomach and snuggling closer to Bernie's neck.

'I didn't think you'd be back the late' Serena groggily spoke without opening her eyes.

'Sorry. Did I wake you?' A pang of guilt washing over her.

'It's fine. I tried to stay awake for you... I guess that didn't work' Serena chuckled as she tightened her grip on Bernie.

Bernie kissed her hairline and pulled her closer causing a sigh of relief to escape for Serena.

'Go to sleep, love'

'Okay... as long as we can pick up where we left off in the morning' Serena said sleepily. 

'You're on, Campbell' Bernie grinned and soon drifted off herself.


	2. Restless Night

CHAPTER 2: RESTLESS NIGHT

'I am actually the size of a whale'

'No, you're not... a bowling ball maybe but not a whale' Bernie said to her wife just before having a pillow hurled at her.

'It's not funny, Bernie' Serena huffed whilst rubbing her swollen belly 'you just try and carry a baby that does somersaults 24/7, makes you need to pee everytime you sit down and stand up and who is already humongous even though we're only 7 months... it's not all a ray of sunshine' Serena ranted.

Bernie put down her toothbrush, wiped her mouth and made her way over to her wife who was slumped down against about a million cushions on their bed. She sat beside her and grabbed her hand which was caressing her belly and replacing it with her own.

'Hey, look at me' Bernie spoke whilst talking Serena's chin and tilting her face up so she was looking at her 'I am so happy with what you are doing, love. You are so brave and loving and I can't believe I have met someone so wonderful and beautiful who is going to give us a baby. I know it's hard. But I'm here. I'm here to be your pillow, or go fetch your crazy midnight craving just because I'm afraid you will actually explode if you get it. I'll hug you when you're scared or you can shout at me when you're mad... either way I can't wait for our baby and I will be here every step of the way. Now how's that sound?'

Serena had a tear in her eye. She didn't know how to responded to this declaration of love and adoration so instead grabbed her wife around the neck and gave her the best hug she could (given the fact that she did actually resemble whale)

'I love you' Serena whispered into her wife's ear 'I'm sorry I've been a pain. I'm just so tired and this one just kicks me all night and I can't get comfortable'

'Well... we'll have to find a solution... okay?'

'Okay'

\---

Having decided to forego their usual evening on the couch, they spent their night on the bed chatting about work, the baby and everything they had to get ready in the next few months. Eventually when night grew nearer, Bernie got up from her position on the floor (because she let Serena spread out like a starfish) she turned out all the lights and pushing Serena over, she got under their duvet.

The lights were off and boh of them lay side by side in an awkward silence. Until Serena sat up and sighed.  
'It's not use, Bern. I can't get comfty... my back hurts but I want to lay on my side and he's kicking my bladder.' She huffed and gave in, resuming her previous

'Hey. Come here.' Bernie pulled her into her shoulder, putting an arm around her bump.

"Now you' Bernie spoke to her belly 'you behave for your mum tonight, she's tired and we need all the energy we get for when you get here. We'll play with toys, go for walks and one day you you may even be a Doctor...' 

Bernie continued and Serena looked up at her wife, their hands linked, resting on her stomach.

'I love you' Serena said interrupting Bernie's monologue 'You're going to be a amazing mum' Serena said gazing into her wife's eyes.

Bernie kissed her in reply 'so are you'

For the first time in a month they found a position which wasn't the most painful for Serena to sleep and which involved a pillow wedge under her bump and that didn't involve Bernie camping on the floor or in the spare room in which involved a pillow wedge under her belly with Bernie constantly rubbing her back until she fell asleep. Bernie watched her wife sleep for a while. She didn't like to see her wife in discomfort but she knew that it would get a lot worse when the baby had finally arrived at least then she could help Serena. Bernie gave her one more peck on the temple before falling asleep herself.

\---

As the night went ahead, Serena got more and more restless. Too hot one moment and too cold another and had already had to pee 3 times. Eventually she decided to go downstairs and leave Bernie to sleep in peace.

She went downstairs equipped with her array of pillows and settled on the sofa. After getting comfty (well trying to anyway) she made her way to the fridge. Gherkins were her current craving. First it was ice cream then French fries (which Bernie had to go an fetch in the middle of the night on many occasions) and jam and now gherkins. She opened up the fridge and grabbed the jar from the door. Struggling to get the lid off, she heard someone clear their throat.

'Need some help?' Bernie lay slouched against the door frame, her head resting on the door and her long fringe hanging over her eyes.

'Go on then.' Serena smiled whilst handing the large jar and with minimalist effort Bernie popped off the lid.

Serena's eyes lit up as she got the jar handed back to her. 

'God, I love you' 

'Are you saying that to me or the gherkin?'

'Definitely the gherkin' Serena sighed as she took another bite.

They both (and the jar) made there way to the living room, put the TV on and got under the blanket. Serena lay with her head on Bernie's shoulder and the jar balanced on her belly. 

'Close your eyes' Bernie said as she laid her hand down on her wife's stomach. 'Try and get some sleep' but before she could finish she noticed that her wife had already drifted off.

An hour later their alarm rung from upstairs.


	3. First Night

CHAPTER 3: FIRST NIGHT

The rather passionate and saucy reunion snog lasted for approximately 11 minutes and 17 seconds before being rudely interrupted by a man from maintenance with a spare key. Their lips were rosy, lipstick crept up Bernie's neck and Serena's shirt hung off one shoulder.

After the awkward silence involving maintenance and two very flushed women, Serena gazed into Bernie's eyes, a hand resting on her wrist pulling her closer.

'Come home with me... tonight. We can talk, get a takeaway, I've missed you.... I just... I just want to spend time with you' Serena said and sealed it with another quick peck.

'I'd love to' Bernie spoke pulling Serena even closer, wrapping her arms around her into a tight embrace. 'I'd really love to'

They rested their foreheads against one another , concealed in their own little bubble before being disturbed by one delightful nephew banging on the door.

'Auntie Serena... your shift finished 20 minutes ago, it's fish and chips night! Can we go? Is Bernie coming too?'

Without moving from their position, Serena looked into Bernie's eyes and spoke  
'I need to go... when do you finish?'

'I've got another hour yet'

'Well come straight round, promise?' Serena said whilst unravelling herself from Bernie. 

'I promise' Bernie kissed her.

'Auntie Serena!' Jason interrupted before they could have a rerun of earlier.

'That boy' She murmured '.... yes Jason, I'm on my way' Serena called back through the door.

'We'll have to thank him later... and Fletch is going to have us buying him pints for the next year'

'Worth it though' Bernie smiled.

'Sure is'

Serena grabbed her stuff swiftly before giving Bernie one more kiss.  
'Don't be late'

'Yes, madame'

\---

3 hours later and after a Chinese feast for two, 2 bottles of wine, a lot of talk and after a certain nephew had gone to bed, Bernie and Serena sat side by side on Serena's sofa fingers and legs entwinned and very much in love.

Serena finally felt happy. Happiness which she hadn't been able to feel since before Kiev. They have spoke about Kiev, how scared Bernie was and the Robbie business (which has been agreed to never ever be mentioned again) 

Serena eventually rests her head to Bernie's welcoming shoulder and Bernie gently presses a kiss to the top of her head. Serena rests her eyes and feels Bernie's lingering stare upon her.

'Stop staring at me' Serena mumbles.

'I'm not staring'

'Yes you are' Serena opens her eyes and shuffles so they are at the same height again 'what's wrong, love?' Serena sees the small sadness in Bernie's eyes.

Bernie's lips start to tremble but Serena grabs her hand tighter.

'I was so stupid, Serena. Why would you want me back after I was such an idiot? I missed you so, so much and...'

Bernie was interrupted by a surge of lips on her own.

'We've spoken about this. We were both stupid and the past is the past. What matters now is me and you, nobody else. We both made mistakes but I know that I love you enough to forgive you everytime' she said before stopping herself saying the 'L' word. Serena looked mortified that she had let it slip. It wasn't exactly the most romantic moment to say it.

'Bernie... I...'

But as Serena did earlier, Bernie silenced her with a kiss.

'I love you, too' She chuckled.

They sat on the sofa for another hour or so (realising it had gone past 1 in the morning) and before Bernie let out a ginormous yawn.

'I should probably head home... it's only a fifteen minute walk' Bernie said beginning to put her shoes back one, which lay at the side of the sofa.

'Or you could stay' Serena said innocently 'please stay...no monkey business just sleep... I don't want you to leave, not just yet'

'Okay' Bernie smiled.  
\---

They both find themselves nestled in Serena's bed. Both dressed in Serena's pyjamas, teeth brushed and with large smiles plastered on their faces. Serena's bedroom was very her, Bernie thought. Rich sheets, makeup and perfumes organised on the dresser and her clothes (including a variety of shirts) which were displayed in colour order. Bernie already loved it.

They both lay at a distance from one another.

'You don't snore do you?' 

'Not that I'm aware of ' Bernie chuckled 'I don't bite you know'

'I know... just didn't know if you were a cuddler in bed'

'I definitely am if the recipient is called Serena Campbell '

Serena shuffled over, resting her head on Bernie's shoulder whilst wrapping her arm over her stomach and entangling their legs.

'I've been imagining and hoping this for a long time' Bernie spoke. 

'You're not the only one' Serena buried her nose into Bernie's curls even more.  
'Do you fancy going out for dinner tomorrow... we could even come back here afterwards?' Bernie could feel Serena smirk into her neck as she said it.

'I'm game' Bernie said.

\---

'I love you, Serena. So, so much' Bernie said into the quiet night whilst stroking Serena's hair, after she had fallen off to sleep and was now snuggled into her ear.

'I love you, too' Serena whispered back.


	4. Bad Night

CHAPTER 4: BAD NIGHT

Storm season was vastly approaching and the Wolfe household was still wide awake at 10:00. Luckily it was the weekend so Cameron and Charlotte were safe to stay up later, snuggled in their mothers arms. They both were put into bed at 8:30 but when the thunder began to cracking, both children had snook downstairs to where Bernie and Serena lay on the sofa. 

\---

'But I don't want to go to bed yet, mama' Cameron spoke to his mother as she tucked him up in bed after reading him his favourite book, twice.

'Come on, little man. Mummy has already let you stay up an extra half an hour, it's half past 8!'

'Fine' Cameron sighed 'when I'm older can I go to bed later?'

'Maybe'

'Please...'

'Come on Cam, into bed before your mummy comes in and tells me off. Charlotte's already been asleep for an hour'

'Yes mummy will tell you off, mama if he stays up any later ' Serena spoke from the doorway where she was leant against the door frame, her hand resting on her small bump that was showing. Bernie looks at her and sticks her tongue out in retaliation.

'Okay, mummy' Cameron replied 'the rain is really noisy though'

'I know... but I can't help that. So come on, sleep time' Bernie spoke tucking him in even tighter.

'Night night, mama' Bernie kissed his forehead and then rubbed his nose with her own before standing up from his bed and backing out of the room.

'Night, mummy' Serena bent down and kissed his cheek 'night, night baby' he said reaching out to touch Serena's belly.

'Night, love' Serena spoke turning out his lamp and finally pulling his door to.

Before heading down the stairs they both peeped around the next door to look in on Charlotte. She was sleeping soundly, her thumb in her mouth, clutching her favourite toy rabbit. Getting a 4 and 2 year old to bed was a difficult challenge but on a night when the majority of Wolfes under this roof don't like thunder, Serena could sense that tonight would be rather tough. Bernie didn't mind the thunder, not really, it was the fact that the slightest bit of noise woke her from her slumber easily and having children really made her realise this.

After their bedroom rounds they both settled on the sofa downstairs, a blanket pulled over there legs whilst Bernie's hand rest on Serena's stomach. Two (almost three) children later and she would never get over the sight of Serena pregnant and the feeling of their baby kicking.

'Well that was a challenge!’

'You can say that again' Bernie said.

'Just you wait until we have three of them' Serena thought out loud.

'Yeah but baby's are easier than 4 Year olds that debate your every decision'

'True' Serena sighed.

The thunder crackled from outside and both of their neck whipped to look out of the window.

'Well if that's just the beginning of the storm then we're in for a long night' Bernie sighed.

'Prepare to have a full bed tonight, Wolfe'

\---

After the third strike of thunder, that is when they started to hear a small whimper.

'I am so not going to sleep tonight' Bernie sighed.

'I can help you take your mind off the storm' Serena spoke peppering Bernie's neck with kisses. But before they could get anymore passionate, Serena heard her name being called.

'Mama....mummy.....mama'

'Can you hear that?’ Serena said halting the kisses (much to Bernie's disappointment)

'What?'

'Mama...mama'

'Is that Charlie?' Bernie questioned.

'Mama' Charlotte snuffled. 

'I'll go' Bernie extracted herself from Serena and ran up the stairs, two at a time.

\---

'Hey, hey, what's wrong?' Bernie asked as she gathered the girl into her arms, squeezing her tight, trying to suppress the cries.

'Scary noises, mama'

'Okay... I've got you. Let's go and see mummy' Bernie said as she wiped a tear from under Charlotte's cheek.

——

Bernie came downstairs with Charlotte on her hip and pulled her under the covers with her and Serena. Charlotte saw her mummy and snuggled into her side.

'You okay, baby?' Serena asked her.

Charlotte simply snuggled more into her mummy and Serena kissed her head.

——

With Serena beginning to get uncomfortable and Charlotte flinching even more as the thunder continued they made their way upstairs to Bernie and Serena's bedroom. Bernie and Serena lay Charlie in the middle whilst they slept on either side of their daughter. Charlotte nuzzled more into Serena and wraps her arm around her belly.

‘I’m scared, mummy’

‘I know, darling. But nothing is going to get you. You are safe here with me and mama’

‘Okay’ she whimpered.

On a particularly loud crash, Bernie’s hand was grabbed by Charlotte and given a good squeeze. Bernie enveloped her girls and brought them all into a group hug.

‘I’ve got you. Don’t worry. Why don’t we play a game or watch some telly?’

‘How about eye spy?’ Serena suggested and Charlotte nodded.

‘I’ll start’ Bernie begun ‘I spy with my little eye, something beginning with a b’

Charlotte began to calm down and look around for things starting with b.

‘Bed?’ She suggested.

‘No’

‘Bernie’ Serena sarcastically interrupted.

‘No, mummy. Don’t be silly’ Bernie cockily spoke back.

‘Book!’

‘Yes!’ Bernie shouted giving her a kiss on the cheek ‘Feeling better now?’ Bernie questioned and Charlotte answered with a firm nod and cuddling into Bernie. 

After a while longer, a few more rounds of eye spy and more heavy and loud strikes of thunder, Serena and Bernie both heard small footsteps moving along the landing.

‘Mummy... mama... can I come in? I’m scared’ Cameron asked.

‘Come on then, my little soldier’ Serena called back.

Cameron bounded in and immediately runs to Bernie’s side, squeezing her tight and getting himself underneath the covers.

‘Is the thunder keeping you up?’ Serena asks with a reassuring squeeze to his hand.

‘It’s very noisy, mummy’ 

‘Well now it’s a party’ Bernie interrupted.

‘Why don’t you and Charlie try and get some sleep then... it’s getting late. Me and mama will look after you and keep you safe’

‘Alright, mummy’ Charlotte spoke with a big yawn wrapping her arms around both mothers.

‘I’ll try, mummy’ Cameron replied.

——

Both of the youngest Wolfes drifted off in the arms of their mothers, safe and protected from the storm.

‘I’m definitely getting kicked out of this bed tonight, you know what Charlotte is like with her feet’ Bernie chuckled.

‘You wouldn’t have them any other way’ Serena mumbled, beginning to fall asleep.

‘I sure wouldn’t’ Bernie replied, reaching over and holding her wife’s hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank You for all you lovely comments, they really make my day!
> 
> Feel free to send an ideas/prompts/suggestions that you would like to see.
> 
> Thanks again,
> 
> MERCI!
> 
> -Q-


	5. Poorly Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry the update was longer than planned. I've been busy with A Levels and personal statement stuff!

Chapter 5: Poorly Night

'Bernie, I've just had a call, it's Charlotte. She's been sick at school... I'll have to go and get her.' Serena barged unto their shared office to where Bernie was sat (apparently) doing admin. 

Bernie looked at her wife and put down the folder she was going begin to fill out.

'Oh God. Is she okay?' Bernie spoke with concern, standing up and walking over to Serena. 

'Fine... I think... just had a funny spell at lunch. I've cleared it with Hanssen and he said that I can have the rest of the afternoon off. Is that okay?'

'Of course. Go. Go, get out of here' she said to Serena as she began pulling on her coat and gathering her things.

'Okay. Thanks' she said, rather wind swept 'I love and I will let you know how she is in a bit' Serena spoke quicky and gave Bernie a peck on the cheek.

'Give her a hug from me' and with that Serena was already half way out of the hospital.

\---

Serena messaged Bernie that Charlotte was fine and just had a stomach bug, was very tired and even more clingy than usual. Bernie managed to catch a lift home with Fletch, picking up Cameron from school and Ellie from the crèche before arriving home. They were stood in the porch of their house when Bernie turned and looked at her children.

'Now remember what I said' she spoke sternly to Cameron whilst Elinor gurgled away, balanced on her hip 'Charlie is a bit tired so don't make too much noise, she might be asleep... even you missus' she said as she tickled Ellie's chin and was rewarded by her youngest taking her fingers and using them to teethe on.

Bernie unlocked the front door, after having waved at Fletch (promising him she'll buy him a pint) and entered the house.

All three of them crept quietly into the hallway, (only the rattle of keys breaking the silence) they peered into the living room and saw Charlotte curled around Serena, a bowl on the floor and (what Bernie though was) a Disney film playing on in the background. As soon as their presence was apparent both sick daughter and wife turned to look at them.

'Why are you being so quiet, mama?' Charlotte questioned as if they're was nothing the matter.

'We thought you might be asleep, mummy messaged saying that you were tired' Bernie replied.

'I just woke up and now me and mummy are watching films' Charlotte yawned.

'Charlotte, are you okay?' Big brother Cam said anxiously, wrapping his arm around her and giving her a hug.

'I still feel a bit sick... '

Bernie looked down at her two eldest, in awe, at how well they got on and the love between brother and sister. They definitely got that from Serena she thought . 

'You'll be okay, love. You just need some rest and some calpol.' Serena interrupted Bernie's thoughts and spoke softly to Charlie. 

'Well I'll help her get better, mummy because that's what big brothers do.'

'Thank You, Cameron' Serena smiled at her son.

\---

Serena left Charlotte dozing on the sofa with Cameron doting on her every need. She, Bernie and Elinor made they're way into the kitchen. 

'So much for the quiet evening we had planned' Serena shrugged 'I guess it's kids films and cuddles' Serena said as she reached out to gather Ellie in her arms from Bernie. 

'They're always next week, love' Bernie said offering a warm squeeze to her shoulder. 

Serena began to put Ellie into her highchair and gathered up some finger food for the little girl to munch away on. Cameron came into the kitchen. 

'Mummy, what are we having for dinner?'

'Pasta tonight, Cam.' Serena replied.

'Charlotte said she is hungry' Cameron said to his mothers. 

'We'll bring her something in, like toast. Okay?' Bernie answered her son. She turned and looked at Serena 'I'm guessing she hasn't eaten since this morning, she seems a little better.'

Serena nodded in agreement and began to load the toaster.

\---

Unfortunate that idea didn't exactly go the way Bernie and Serena had hoped. The toast left her body minutes after consumption. Which had caused her to become more weepy, in need of new clothes, cuddles and more sleep. Cameron had gone up to bed, being 'very grown up' as he had put it and got dressed and read himself a bedtime story. He was extremely proud of himself. Ellie had fallen asleep, nestled on Serena's chest whilst Bernie had Charlotte curled into her - her temperature falling and therefore covered in a huge blanket and a hot water bottle. Shortly after Ellie had drifted off, Serena had taken her up to her nursery, kissed her cheek and left her to dream.

She returned downstairs, to the third running of Beauty and the Beast.

'Shall we all head up now? Hopefully you'll sleep of your bug, Charlotte'

Charlotte nodded and gripped tightly to her mumma as she was lifted to Bernie's hip and carried up the stairs whilst Serena turned everything off downstairs. They reached the landing.

'Mumma , I sleep with you?'

'Of course you can' Serena replied from behind them as she climbed up the stairs. 

\---

Charlotte took Bernie's side of the bed, closest to the bucket on the floor and nearest to the ensuite. With Bernie crammed into the middle and Serena hanging off the edge. It wasn't ideal but it was what Bernie described as 'cosy'. She had definitely bunked in worse places and conditions. Charlotte had no energy and Bernie helped her tired daughter into her pyjamas before tucking her up in bed and waiting for Serena to remerge from the ensuite.

Serena came back into the room to find her wife and daughter curled into each other. Bernie stroking her hair whilst Charlotte fell into a blissful sleep. 

'She always used fall asleep like that when she was a baby, do you remember?' Serena said as she got underneath the covers and snuggled into Bernie's other side.

'I do. Exactly like her mother' Bernie sniggered.

'Hopefully she's better soon. She'll hate to miss school and we can't take too many days off.' Serena spoke. 

'She be back to normal in a few days' Bernie said as she gave Charlotte a kiss on her hairline. 

'Well the good news is that I don't think she has anything in her stomach left to throw up' Serena laughed.

'Don't speak too soon' Bernie yawned and wrapped her arms more around her wife and daughter.

'It's a good job we've got a King sized bed' Bernie mocked. 

'Just you wait until we have Cam in here with us in the morning... and once Ellie hears Cam she'll definitely be in here too.' Ellie currently being amazed at her big brother, the funny faces he pulls and how he played with her.

'I look forward to it...and at least I've got two of my girls' Bernie kissed Serena lightly on the lips. She gave an almighty yawn and closed her eyes.

\----

*knock*knock*

'Mummy, I don't feel very well' Cameron spoke through the door.

'You better budge up a bit, Wolfe. We've got a full bed tonight' Serena jabbed at her wife and went and got their little boy, bringing him back to their bed. Squeezing in... somehow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all your comments and praise. If anyone has any ideas/prompts then let me know. I hope you're still enjoying.
> 
> MERCI!
> 
> -Q-


	6. Grumpy (Mardy) Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ideally, this chapter would be have called 'Mardy Night' but given the fact it is only a word used pretty much where I am from, I thought that nobody would really get it! 
> 
> Thanks for reading.

Chapter 6: Grumpy (Mardy) Night 

Serena had been on the prowl all day; shouting at F1's, reaching tipping point with patients and being even more annoyed with Bernie and paper work.

'Have you finished them folders, I asked you to complete 3 days ago?' Serena scowled.

'I haven't had chance to do it, what with the electives, Charlie's school project, trauma calls...' She went on.

'Fine. I'll do it myself.' Serena interpupted and started to walk out of the office before turning back around and looking Bernie dead in the eyes 'can't you do anything I say... it's not bloody rocket science, Bern. You know what is bloody rocket science... getting you to do something productive. You can be such a nightmare' she turned on her heel and slammed the door.

Bernie sat there shocked. She had never seen Serena like this. What was wrong with her? Bernie put the thought into the back of her mind, convincing herself that her wife was under stress or feeling under the weather. 

Bernie remerge from their office and joined Fletch and Raf at the nurses station.

'What's up with her?' Bernie said to them as all three sets of eyes followed her pacing inbetween beds.

'You're her wife, shouldn't you know?' Raf mocked.

'She's been grumpy all day, I swear she almost bit off Nurse Hardy's hand off earlier and she only dropped a pen' Fletch added.

''Well I haven't a clue!' Bernie huffed as Serena glanced at the three of them when she walked past.

'Haven't we any work to be doing?' Serena spoke.

'Of course, Mrs Wolfe' all three spoke in unison.

\---

'Mummy can I have a drink, please?'

'Cameron, I've just sat down. Can't you let me eat my dinner first?'

'But mummy... it's hot' Cameron murmured timidly.

'Fine!' Serena let out with an almighty huff and began to push her chair back before Bernie laid her hand upon Serena's.

'I'll get him one, love. Eat your dinner' and with that Bernie made Cameron (and Charlotte) a drink.

The dinner continued in an awkward silence with occasional jabber from Ellie and small talk between the two eldest. 

'Mama, I don't like peas' Charlotte spoke, afraid of what her mummy's reaction may be.

'Okay, but eat everything else up, alright?' Bernie replied. Charlotte gave an enthusiastic nod.

'You should really eat your peas though, Charlie. They're good for you' Serena inputted.

Eventually the dinner had finished and Bernie took the three children into the living room and settled them down with a film.

'What's wrong with mummy, mama?' Charlotte looked up at Bernie.

'I don't know, love. I think she's just stressed at work - she had a lot of surgeries today'

'She sleepy?'

'Maybe..' Bernie replied.

'She's grumpy, that what she is' Cameron muttered under her breath.

'Cameron! Mummy is just very busy and I think that we should just try and help her out' Bernie suggested. 

'I'll give her a cuddle later' Charlotte offered.

'I'll think she'd like that' Bernie smiled and left her children in the living room before going to help Serena in the kitchen.

'Can't you help, Bernie ,instead of just standing there? We've both been at work all day you know' Serena put the plates down with a rather firm whack.

Bernie continued to load the dishwasher whilst Serena scrubbed at the pans. She thought that she may as well ask Serena what was wrong... it was now or never.

'What's gotten into you today? At work and now here?'

'Nothing. Just trying to do a hundred things here at once' Serena inputted whilst viciously drying up a plate.

'You're not on your own, Serena. Fletch and Raf are worried... you've been on a warpath. And Charlotte thinks their is something going on and not to mention the way you shouted at me today in the office. I've never seen you like that before, 'Rena'

'I'm tired, Bern. Tired and stressed and I can't be doing with all these questions... for goodness sake, I've told you how to load this dishwasher before, does anybody actually listen to me?'

'Enough of this! Our children are in the other room, all they want is their mummy but she's been on tenterhooks for hours. Go in there and be with   
them instead of taking out whatever this is on me' Bernie spoke firmly and with a slightly raised voice. She loved her wife but she knew that this was effecting the children and work colleagues. 

'Fine!' Serena threw down a tea towel and stormed out 'Sleep in the spare room tonight'

Bernie rolled her eyes.

\---

Bernie sat at the kitchen table, completing the admin for Serena. Cameron and Charlotte both strolled in, followed by a crawling Ellie and Serena lingering in the doorway.

'Mummy said we have to go to bed now, mama' Charlotte opened her arms to be picked up by Bernie and given a squeeze and kiss on the cheek. 

'Okay' she said as she placed Charlotte back down on the floor and gave Cameron a kiss on the cheek and Ellie a cuddle from where she was sat on the floor.

'Sweet dreams' she smiled at them as they followed Serena upstairs.

\---

And hour or so later Bernie had finally finished the reports and was last one downstairs. She switched off all the lights and checked the door before ascending the stairs. Cautiously she approached the master bedroom, to find her pyjamas and pillow were at the foot of the door along with her toothbrush so she could make her way to the spare room. From the room she heard what she thought was crying but dismissed it, thinking everyone else was quiet and asleep.

\---

Bernie made her way to the spare room. Down the corridor from the master. It's plain walls and less expensive bed linen covered the room and gave it a rather dim feeling. She got as comfty as possible and tried to drift off.

\---

Bernie still couldn't sleep. She hadn't spent a night alone in years and it felt awfully wrong. Was Serena being serious? What was really the matter? It certainly wasn't the first time they had fought but they always made it up by the time they went to bed, as if nothing had happened. Her reverie was interrupted. 

'Bernie?' A voice whispered from outside the door. Bernie looked towards the door and it opened. There appeared Serena, red eyed and sniffling. She made her way over to the small single bed, Bernie instantly moving over and Serena getting underneath the shared covers.

'I'm so sorry' Serena cried.

'Shush...Shush. It's okay. I've got you.' Bernie kissed her.

Serena snuggled even closer into Bernie.  
'I was such an idiot. I'm so sorry. I'm just so stressed, Henrick wants a tonne of reports and we're short staffed, longer hours.... I'm so tired, Bernie. I just can't sleep.'

'You can sleep now. Don't worry,we'll sort it out together' Bernie soothed her wife. How could Serena be going through all this pressure without her realising? Bernie simply held her closer and hugged her better.

'I shouldn'the have said those things, I'm so sorry'

'It's all forgotten now '

'I couldn't sleep without you.' Serena spoke after a brief silence.

'Me neither' Bernie agreed.

'Let's not fall out again' Serena spoke 'It's real boring, love'

'Good idea' Bernie laughed.

They both drifted off, crammed into a small single bed but neither of them cared because they were together.


	7. Sleepover Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry I haven’t updated this fic in a while - I’ve been busy on my other! Thank you for the response towards both of them - the kudos and comments really mean a lot. I anyone has an requests or idea’s regarding this fic then please let me know!
> 
> I’d just like to say how thrilled I am at the response of ‘It’s never to late to be who you want to be’ - that one has really come from the heart - thank you all so much - you are brilliant
> 
> Thank You so much again!

CHAPTER 7: Sleepover Night

Both Bernie and Serena kicked off their shoes, pulled a blanket out from the back of the sofa, grabbed a glass of wine and gave out a sigh of relief. Tonight all the children were out and as much as they loved their Wolfe pack, they were well and truly ready for a night in, all to themselves without a child wanting their attention. Cameron was at a sleepover whilst Serena’s mum offered to take the other two off their hands for an evening - it had planned out perfectly.

‘Cheers’ Bernie spoke, tapping the rim of her glass to Serena’s, before pulling her into a tighter embrace embrace.

Serena smiled up at her wife and rested her head in the crook of Bernie’s neck.

‘As much as I love them to pieces - it’s nice for it to just be us two for a bit’

‘You can say that again’ Bernie spoke, taking a gulp of her wine.

There was a silence - not an awkward one but one where usually there would be a question from an innovative 8 year old or a giggle from a pair of girls, who were busy being as thick as thieves.

‘It’s awfully quiet though’ Serena inputted, seeing Bernie with her head leant on the back of the sofa.

‘Don’t ruin the moment ‘Rena. It’s just me, you no children and a whole house to ourselves - think of all the things we could do’ Bernie spoke with a mischievous grin on her face.

‘Mmm… think about it we could have a bath...in warm water, or order Thai food, for once… and we could even watch that film we wanted to without a baby crying’ Serena spoke oblivious to Bernie’s suggestions.

Bernie rolled her eyes  
‘Well I was thinking more along the lines of in the bedroom, love but if you’d much prefer a curry, I’m game’ Bernie said sarcastically.

Serena raised an eyebrow ‘Yeah...or we could.. we could spend a lot of time upstairs’’ She said whilst nipping at the skin of her wife’s neck, earning a moan from Bernie.

‘Or we could even do all of the above… in any order’ Bernie spoke as Serena began to get a bit more passionate and delved in for Bernie’s lips.

‘Which one first then Mrs. Wolfe?’ Serena said in between kisses - practically on top of her wife.

‘Definitely this one’ Bernie spoke and in one quick movement picked Serena up and carried her upstairs.

——

‘Hmmm… Bernie. Careful, the door!’ Serena spoke tumbling from Bernie’s grip. She opened the door and dragged Bernie by the hand and led her to the bed.

Serena walked over to her side of the bed and started to take off her watch, pager, phone and earrings and placed them on her bedside table when Bernie came up behind and wrapped her arms around her waist and kissed her neck.

‘Patience, Berenice’ Serena mocked, being extremely slow on purpose.

‘Come on, Serena’ Bernie spoke, her hands wandering everywhere ‘we have an empty house and we can be as loud as we like… let’s make the most of tonight’

‘Fine’ Serena said as she turned around in her wife’s arms . She gazed into Bernie's eyes, the same dreamy eyes she fell in love with all them years ago. She leant in to kiss her wife’s perfect lips.

‘I love you’ Serena said as she pecked Bernie’s lips.

‘I love you, too’ Bernie spoke as she wrapped her strong arms around Serena’s shoulders and pulled them both down on the bed.

Bernie lay on top of Serena, the moment getting rather steamy. Serena pushed her hands under Bernie’s shirt finding her warm skin. She pulled her wife closer, attempting to remove her clothing (which all of a sudden became very annoying)

‘Serena…’ Bernie shivers when Serena’s nails rake up and down her back. She dives back to Serena’s mouth when suddenly she thought she heard the dulcet tones of David Bowie coming from Serena’s phone. Bernie pulled away Serena, leaving her wife rather confused before seeing the light coming from her phone and the chorus of ‘Oh You Pretty Things’ filling the room.

‘Seriously?’ Serena moaned as Bernie rolled off her to let Serena answer the unwanted caller.

‘Hello, Serena Wolfe?’ 

——

‘Come on then, in you go’ Bernie spoke as she led Cam through the front door by the hand.

Serena stood at the bottom of the stairs, her arms folded, wrapped up in a dressing gown. She wasn’t angry as such but just wished her and Bernie got down to the monkey business before they got the phone call. She didn’t blame Cameron at all - it was his first sleepover with his friend Max - he must’ve just got cold feet and missed is mums.

‘I’m sorry, mummy - I just wanted to come home’ Cameron said as his bottom lip trembled. Serena immediately felt guilt for her little boy - she bent down, picked him up and enveloped him in her arms, protecting him from the rest of the world.

‘Don’t worry’ she whispered in his ear ‘me and mama weren’t doing anything anyway’ Serena spoke looking at Bernie over Cameron’s shoulder and gave her a brief smile.

‘Why don’t we go an watch a film? - the girls are still at grandma’s house so we can watch anything you want tonight. Just you, mummy and me - how about it?’ Bernie wondered.

‘Really?’ Cameron questioned in disbelief.

‘Yeah, really. No go on - go choose something’ Serena replied, ushering him out of the hallway.

‘I’m sorry’ Serena spoke, immediately wrapping her arms around Bernie’s shoulders. She knew that she had been looking forward to this evening all week.

‘It’s okay - an evening with my wife and boy - I suppose it’s not too bad… you’ll have to repay me somehow though Mrs. Wolfe’ Bernie whispered in her ear.

‘I’m sure I can think of something’ Serena replied whilst nipping at her lobe.

‘MUMMY… MAMA - come on, I’ve found something.’

——

They both lay in bed. Bliss domesticity. They both lay face to face and even though they weren’t doing what they had intended to do in the privacy of their bedroom - but it was better than having to listen to the quiet snores of baby Elinor.

‘I promise I’ll make it up to you - maybe my mother will take them again in a few weeks or so - she loves the rustle and bustle of it all’ Serena spoke as she stroked her wife’s cheek.

‘Hmm… maybe’ Bernie muttered as she began to close her eyes.

‘At least we didn’t have to watch Cinderella on repeat, for the third consecutive Friday. I’d say it was alright - we both had lukewarm baths and the day off together tomorrow’ 

‘It was fine, love. Better than fine. Stop worrying’ Bernie kissed her cheek as she sensed her wife feeling guilty.

‘Mama...mummy…. can I come in?’

Bernie rolled over to see Cam at the door, armed with his favourite teddy.

They both just smiled at him, Bernie pulling the duvet up, letting him get in with them. He may be 8 years old but as Serena had put it, not too old for a good cuddle with your mums. Bernie moved closer to Serena and pulled Cameron more towards her - suddenly becoming a pillow for two, in the process.

‘Okay?’ Serena questioned as she placed her hand over Cameron’s arm.

‘Yeah… It’s just too quiet without Charlie and Ellie… there are a lot of noises’ Cameron replied - his eyes drooping like his mother’s.

‘Close your eyes then, love’ Bernie said as she kissed his head and wrapped her arm more around Serena before giving her a peck on the cheek. 

Bernie knew this was not how this evening was supposed to go - but she wouldn’t change it for the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> I am determined to start to write more frequently but with the hectic schedule of A Levels, I can’t be sure. I love writing these and I’d love to know what y’all think about it!
> 
> Merci 
> 
> -Q-


	8. Tipsy Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hands up! ✋

CHAPTER 8: Tipsy Night

The ultimate highlight of the year was the staff Christmas party. There was alcohol, music, food, dancing, more alcohol, more food and best of all, for Serena, she had Bernie by her side. For the first time in a long time, Serena was happy. Happier than she had ever been and she had to admit that it was partly because she got to spend all evening (and all night) with a particular blonde trauma surgeon but also because said trauma surgeon was her best friend, her co-lead and that one person who would send butterflies to her belly with a single touch. Being the strong, independent woman she is, Serena wasn’t ashamed at who she loved - just the fact that it was likely she’d be the centre of the nurses gossip. So after watching Arty single handedly take down her, Bernie and Morven at poker, she decided that she’d go an join the rest of the gang down at Albie’s for the evening’s festivities. She stood in the mirror, in the staff changing room, reapplied a fresh layer of makeup, smoothed down her shirt, took a deep breath and made her way back onto the ward to find her army medic waiting for her at the nurses station.

‘Ready, Campbell?’ Bernie questioned.

‘As I’ll ever be, Ms. Wolfe’ Serena smirked back.

Serena followed Bernie into the lift before giving Morven and Fletch a small wave.

‘I want someone who looks at me, the way Bernie looks at Serena’ Morven sighed, looking to Fletch as theyentered the lift.

‘One day, kid. One day’ Fletch said patting her shoulder, watching the doors close.

———

‘I must say Ms. Campbell - you are looking rather radiant this evening’ Bernie spoke as the doors closed.

‘Flattery will get you nowhere, Ms. Wolfe’ Serena spoke turning to face Bernie and closing the gap. Serena took Bernie’s hand and began to pull her closer until the lift stopped and they pulled apart. 

They both stepped out of the lift and made their way to Albies. As they walked in the cold, winter night, Bernie felt Serena slip her hand into her own. Bernie turned her head to look at her, smiled and pulled her closer.

——-

One too many glasses of Shiraz later, the Christmas music began. Serena became rather merry, dancing with Raf, Fletch, Sacha and even Hanssen (just to name a few) Bernie sat by the bar, watching Cam and Morven flirting, Serena having a ball and Dom and Essie doing a variety of colourful shots. This was her family now and she absolutely loved every single minute - she felt as if she finally belonged. The music suddenly changed to a slow, sensual track and Serena’s eyes suddenly flew to Bernie, sat at the bar. Bernie rolled her eyes upon seeing Serena walking (more like swaying) towards her, offering her a hand.

‘Fancy this dance?’ Serena spoke, raising an eyebrow.

Bernie let out a sigh and gave in. Serena dragged Bernie through the crowd to a free space, surrounded by Raf and Essie, Ric and Morven, Jasmine and Fletch. Serena placed Bernie’s hands on her waist and wrapped her own around her partner’s neck. They gently swayed in time with the music, gazing lovingly into each other’s eyes.

‘You know what?’ Serena spoke, slurred, into Bernie’s ear.

‘What’s that?’ Bernie answered.

‘This is going to be the best Christmas… because I’ve got you’ Serena smiled.

Bernie gently kissed her neck.

‘Careful, Wolfe. Don’t want to give them a show.’ Serena said, her forehead resting against Bernie’s.

‘You’re one to talk!’

‘Fine… Screw the gossip!’ Serena gave in and placed a long, lingering kiss upon Bernie’s lips.

‘Merry Christmas, Bernie’ 

———

‘How many glasses have you actually had, I only bought you two?’

‘What can I say! I’m a popular woman’ Serena said as she attempted to take off her shoes at the bottom of the stairs, besides the front door, Bernie holding her arms as she did so.

Bernie laughed and pushed away the hair from Serena’s eyes before kissing the tip of her nose.

‘Come on, let’s get you to bed, yeah?’ Bernie offered and Serena replied with a firm nod.

——

Bernie helped Serena into her pyjamas after a few false starts, trying to get her shirt over her head.

‘Right, I’ve got you a glass of water and some painkillers here, if you need them’ Bernie spoke as she got herself into the opposite side of the bed.

‘I’m fine, Bern - not drunk, just tipsy’ Serena replied.

‘You tripped up the curb ‘Rena’ Bernie mocked back.

‘Good job, I had you to catch me then’ Serena spoke as she nuzzled into Bernie’s side, wrapping her arm around her stomach and closing her eyes.

‘Oh wait. I have something for you here’ Bernie spoke and reached over to the floor for the mystery item.

‘What’s that then?’ Serena spoke from her tired state, her eyes slowly opening.

‘Merry Christmas!’ Bernie spoke, holding a piece of mistletoe from the party above them.

‘Happy Christmas’ Serena said, a huge smile plastered on her face, she closed the gap and placed a kiss to Bernie’s lips.

‘I love you’ Serena mumbled when they parted. Serena resumed her position and fell into a reverie.

Only to wake up with a killer hangover in the morning and a unsympathetic doctor beside her...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!  
> If anyone has any ideas/prompts let me know!  
> I will be updating my other fic soon, so stay tuned.
> 
> Merci!
> 
> -Q-


	9. Exam Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Given the fact that next year, exams will be the death of me, I thought that it would be sensible to write a ‘before the exam’ AU. It is a bit smaller than the usual! I hope you enjoy. Please let me know what you all think!

CHAPTER 9: Exam Night

Bernie and Serena had both met each other at university. Young and in love - with no cares in the world - except for the exam Serena had the next morning. As well as being the top dog medical student at university, just to keep herself extra busy, she decided to study business as well. In their fourth year, after a round of student and shared accomodation with their friends, they decided that it was time to get a place, just the two of them. After traipsing around small, student flats, they finally found one together. A small, one bedroomed flat, with a large window spreading across one wall, which overlooked London, they could even see the London eye from a distance. It wasn’t luxurious as such but it was theirs (for the time being) and they loved it. Yes, there was a bit of damp in the corner by the door and the window took some effort to open, however they wouldn’t change it for the world. 

Tomorrow was exam day, well for Serena anyway. Nerves didn’t always get to her but if they did she was rather good at not showing them. Yet, the exam which she had revised for, for more hours than she could remember was around was at 11:00 AM tomorrow morning. It was already 10:00 PM when she looked up at the clock for the last time. She declined Bernie’s offer of dinner (Spaghetti carbonara à la Bernie), drank about 10 cups of tea instead and chewed her nails more as night grew. Serena was sat at the desk located in the small living room (although it wasn’t much of a room), which was adjoining to the bedroom. She saw Bernie, sprawled out across the bed from where she was sitting in the swivel chair, a book of some kind in her hand. It looked like some classic, the classic she had read over and over again. An aspect of Bernie that she will forever love. She regretted not following Bernie earlier when she asked her to bed, when she placed a hand on her shoulder and kissed her neck goodnight. 

Enough!

Enough, Serena thought. She thought that if she didn’t know it now then she wouldn’t know it at all (she knew everything like a whizz anyway) and that she’d rather get a good few hours sleep, huddled up with her Bernie than stay up and have bloodshot eyes in the exam. She closed down the laptop, tidied up the array of post-it notes and pens and made her way to the bedroom. She saw Bernie’s eyes begin nod off and spent a minute admiring the view. They may be young and wild but she knew one thing for certain - that Bernie was it. She made her laugh, she made her cry, she even infuriated her at times but she loved her with all her might.

‘Knock, knock… room for a little one?’ Serena said, stood against the doorframe.

Bernie opened her eyes, closed the book properly and placed it on their bedside table and moved over to make room for Serena. Serena strolled over, readied herself for bed before getting under the covers. She immediately moved closer to Bernie - resting her head on her shoulder and slipping her hand around her stomach. A position which they had already spent years perfecting.

‘All ready for tomorrow then?’ Bernie questioned whilst kissing the brown hair underneath her nose.

‘As ready as I’ll ever be’ Serena yawned in reply.

‘You are going to do amazing. I am so proud of you, Serena. So proud.’ Bernie said punctuating her words with even more small kisses.

‘Thank you, love’ Serena spoke cuddling into Bernie more.

‘Everything is going to go great, we’ll wake up early, I’ll come with you on the tube… and if you’re really lucky, I’ll even treat you to breakfast. And I reckon, if we leave by 9:30, you’ll even have some time to revise or I’ll test you… well...well that’s if you want to… of course.’

Serena gazed into her love’s eyes.

‘I’d really like that. Thank you.’ Serena said, leaning in to give Bernie a chaste kiss on the lips before tickling her nose with her own.

‘I love you… and I don’t deserve you’ Serena said pulling away from her girlfriend’s face.

‘Shush you. Now come on. Sleep. We’ve got a busy tomorrow… especially if we are going out to celebrate tomorrow night… a long, long day, indeed’ Bernie whispered into her ear.

And all Serena could do was smirk and think about D-Day tomorrow...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for reading and staying with me. This holiday, I have done so much writing and I am hoping that this productive streak will continue!! 
> 
> Merci!
> 
> -Q-


	10. Absent Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well it's been a while! I have finally finished my A Levels so I am gonna be writing some more! Hopefully I will get back to my other fics too!
> 
> Would be great for prompts, ideas, feedback! Much appreciated.
> 
> Thank you, everyone!
> 
> Merci beaucoup
> 
> -Q-

Bernie had been gone for almost 4 months now. A five-month deployment was nothing compared to her last nine month one, Serena attempted to justify in her head. When Bernie left for her long nine months in Afghanistan, Cam was only three months old. Serena certainly worried that Bernie wouldn’t be there for the birth, but she had kept her promise and was by her wife’s side through every contraction, yell and insult. Serena worried that Baby Cameron would forget his mother, her voice, the way he nuzzled into her chest as he relaxed after being fed, the little whispers and promises exchanged between the two – but Serena found that with better technology and constant string of telling her son that his mama loved him and their weekly video calls, by the time Bernie returned from the nine months, the two of them were as thick as thieves and splitting them up for a second time was one of the most heart-breaking things Serena had ever had to do. Of course, Cameron was still young, he didn’t understand but Serena knew that with the way Bernie clung on that little bit tighter, he recognised something was different.

\---

‘It’s not as long as last time, remember? You’ll be home in no time’ Serena said as the two of them sat in the car, her hand resting on her wife’s thigh, slowly drawing circles with her thumb.

They had decided to leave Cameron at his Grandmother’s before heading towards the base – both his parents knowing ultimately one of them would cry. This was always a difficult time – saying goodbye. 

They had done in plenty of times over the past 15 years they had been together. 

‘I know,’ Bernie smiled back. She knew her wife was putting on a strong face. She had to. She had their son, back at home, to care for whilst she was away in a war zone.

They pulled up to the base. Parking outside. This was as far as Serena could go. They had travelled most of the journey in silence, both with tears glistening in their eyes but eventually they got out of the car for the inevitable.

‘Right then, Wolfe. Go and make us proud,’ Serena said to her wife, cupping her cheek before pressing their lips gently together.

Bernie couldn’t help but reciprocate, her arms wrapping them as tight as they could around Serena whilst their lips met over and over again. God, even after all these years, I’ll never get tired of these!   
Bernie thought. A stray tear crept down Bernie’s face, her wife pulling back and brushing it away. It was harder this time. She had already missed nine months of Cam’s life – she didn’t want to miss anymore yet she knew she was heavily needed on the front line.

‘Stay safe, promise us?’ Serena spoke as their foreheads touched.

‘Always. I love you.’

‘I love you, too… Me and Cam… we love you so much, Mama Wolfe,’

Bernie sniggered – it has been Bernie’s name ever since finding out they were expecting – it may be the cheesiest title she had and not quite ‘Major’ but she loved it.

‘Don’t forget to give Cam a kiss from me at night, okay?’

‘I promise,’

\---

Cam had been learning to talk more. Within the year in which Bernie was at home, in between tours, Bernie was able to help him learn to walk, begin to feed himself, mumble a variation of ‘Mummy’ and ‘Mama’ and play together. He understood who his Mummy and Mama were, that sometimes his Mama had to go away and that they both loved him undeniably. In particular, he loved that sometimes at night he would see his Mama through Skype calls. He stumbled over words and tried to have conversations with her. They would lay in his mothers’ bed, Serena watching the two of them interact, stroking her son’s hair before falling asleep.

The only bad thing was when Bernie couldn’t call them. Cameron would become grumpy, clingy and would call out for his Mama. Sadly, it has been three weeks, Bernie constantly in and out of camp, around the clock paper work. Serena and Bernie had exchanged a few words of love between themselves, letting Cameron briefly listen to his Mama’s voice – yet it still wasn’t quite as soothing as seeing her face as well. Serena saw the shift in attitude, he was weepier and would call out for his mother more often. She had tried everything: words of comfort, distraction but none of them seemed to work.  
It had just gone midnight in the UK when Serena heard whimpers from the next room followed by shouts for ‘Mama’. She had never known cries like this before, she thought they may pass but Cameron grew louder and louder before Serena had no choice to see what was wrong with him. His night light was on and she saw the utter sadness and longing for his Mama in his eyes. She pulled him from the cot, squeezing him tight, promising that his Mama loved him. She walked back to her bedroom hoping he would quieten down.

‘Hey… Shhh… you’re okay,’

The noise just grew and grew.

‘Why don’t we go on Mummy’s phone. I’m sure we’ve got some pictures on there.’

Serena grabbed her phone, still bouncing up and down in her arms. He was getting heavier and she didn’t know what to do. She attempted to unlock her phone, getting the passcode wrong a few times under pressure.

‘Cameron… come on. Mummy’s tired. Please quieten down. Shh… shh’ Serena began to get teary.

Eventually she unlocked her phone, scrolling to the pictures she had of Bernie. Some from when they were younger together, some with her and Cam as a new born and even one of her and Cam snuggled up together on the bed, the last time she came back from her deployment. Usually they would calm him down. She begun to think that there might be something else the matter with him, but she looked him all over and he seemed fine. Just longing for his mother. She didn’t know what to do. She didn’t want to call her mother or Sian, they didn’t deserve to be bothered. She did the only other thing she thought she could.

She dialled the number for her Wife’s phone – hoping that she’d pick up – it was a long shot. The time difference meant it must be nearly half four in the morning, but she needed a familiar face to help their baby. She was about to give up, Cameron’s wailing still dominating the room. Until she heard the voice of her wife.

‘S’rena… what’s up?’ Bernie spoke sincerely with a husky voice full of sleep.

‘Bern!’ Serena spoke, the tears beginning to fall, with a sigh of relief.

‘What’s wrong, love?’ Bernie heard crying. Was it Cameron? Why is she ringing at this time?

‘It’s Cam – I can’t settle him… he… he keeps calling for you. I don’t know what to do, B. I just needed to hear your voice and I think he does too. He misses you. I’m so sorry, I…’ Serena spoke quickly still   
cradling Cameron.

‘One sec, give me a minute… It’s gonna be okay, love’

No more than a minute later, Serena heard her iPad from the side of her bed begin to ring. Cameron may still be young, but he could recognise that sound in a heartbeat. His cries slowed – his eyes still puffy and red and a constant stream of sniffles whilst his mum walked over to the side of the bed to accept the call. 

Cameron saw his Mama straight away. She looked tired, was dressed in an oversized hoodie yet to him she was there, and she was perfect. 

‘Mama! Mama!’ he called out yet this time it was in excitement. 

‘Hey, you, what’s all this noise for? Why aren’t you letting your Mummy sleep, eh?’

Cameron was contempt in just watching his mother’s presence. Serena pulled them both over to her bed, both laying down whilst the iPad lay where Bernie would usually sleep, Serena wrapping her arm around her son as Cam and Bernie spoke lightly. They spoke for a small while. Bernie telling him his favourite story, one in which she could remember from putting him to bed when she was home. They were all becoming tired. It has been a long night. Bernie had moved her laptop from her desk to a chair beside her bed so that she too could get comfortable. It felt like they were all in the same room still, not thousands of miles apart. She would give anything to be with the actual thing though – not just a picture of her wife and son. She watched Serena fall asleep first. Her nose nuzzled into their son’s hair. Eventually Cam grew tired and fell asleep too. This was her perfect picture. 

‘Serena… Serena’ A voice whispered from the device beside her. 

Serena couldn’t remember falling asleep. She saw her soldier on the screen and couldn’t help but smile at her face.

‘Hey. Sorry, how long have a been asleep?’ She asked quietly, trying not the wake the sleeping child.

‘An hour or so, I didn’t have the heart to wake you,’ Bernie smiled.

‘Did you sleep?’ Serena questioned, a pang of guilt washing over her.

‘A little.’ Bernie spoke. She was no longer in her nightwear and looked as if she was ready for another hard day in the field.

‘I’m sorry I didn’t call sooner. I didn’t know he was that bad.’ Bernie said, a hint of sadness in her voice.

‘It’s okay. I didn’t think he was that bad either. I’m sorry I woke you, I just didn’t know what to do,’

‘Hey, it’s okay. I’ll call you gain this evening, yeah? When you’re home from work. We can talk a bit better.’

‘Okay,’ Serena replied. A smile masking her face despite the eventful night all three of them had undergone.

‘I have to go now but I love you and I’ll speak to you soon… don’t forget to give him a kiss from me when he wakes, yeah?’

‘I will, and I love you, too,’ Serena promised before smiling one last time and ending the call.

The room strangely was peaceful, Cameron’s snores still filling the room and Serena finally could fall back to sleep. Despite her wife being thousands of miles away, she still was still the best mother she knew. Only one month to go.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading... more chapters to come.
> 
> I'm still continuing with my other work... so stay tuned
> 
> MERCI!


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